Layoff. Reduction in force. Redundancy. No matter what word you put on it, a layoff is one of the hardest things for a manager to lead through. It’s natural to feel overwhelmed in this situation, regardless of whether you’re the decision-maker on who is leaving the company. You will have your own feelings about what is happening, at the same time that you’re working to support team members who are leaving and team members who are staying.

When you’re a manager in this terrible situation, give yourself grace. Take time for yourself. Invest heavily in self-care for the next few weeks. (Yes, weeks. The impacts of a layoff are long-lasting. I’m sorry.) If you’ve got a therapist, spend time with them. If you don’t have a therapist, this might be a good time for that. Whatever you do, do not dump your feelings down on your team. Don’t hide that you’ve got feelings, rather don’t dump on them. Your team needs to see you handling this situation empathetically for those who were laid off and those who remain.

While you’re giving grace, make sure to give some to your peer managers. They’re also dealing with lots of difficult things. Check in 1:1. Managers often don’t get a ton of support in a time like this, especially if their team was relatively lightly-impacted, but they’re still dealing with the survivor syndrome of themselves and their team, plus trying to figure out how to move forward. Give your peer managers some space to say the things that they can’t say to their directs, and be vulnerable with trusted peer managers too.

Whenever you talk to your Human Resources business partner (HRBP), give them some extra grace. Layoffs are terrible for HRBPs. They’re dealing with the worst of this situation. If you’ve got a good relationship with your HRBP, offer them some safe space to talk/vent/whatever.

In the weeks after the layoff, you will probably see some problematic behaviors amongst your team and others. Some folks are going to throw themselves into their work to have somewhere to channel their feelings. Some folks are going to throw themselves into their work because they’re terrified of getting laid off next. Some folks are going to disengage for a bit. Be prepared for all of that and do what you can to redirect the unhealthy behavior. If your employer has any benefits like an employee assistance plan (EAP), this is a great time to refer folks to it.

Folks are probably going to be on edge for a few weeks, or even longer. You will probably see an increased amount of interpersonal tension and stress behaviors. Be ready to manage that. Any big internal event or milestone, like a launch or review time, will probably cause more of those emotions and behaviors to bubble up. By being prepared for this, you can help divert behaviors away from unproductive or toxic ones. Many of the folks who remain might be nervous about the future of the company and whether there will be future layoffs. When you’re asked about these, be honest about what you know and what you can share with them.

You might find that your team has reduced trust in you because they believe (rightfully or not) that you must have known something in advance or must have made decisions about who to keep. They might think that you should have done more to prevent the layoff. You will have work to do to regain their trust.

This is one of the awful times of management. You can get through this.